So, we could take this a few ways. We could take the fact that I’m making a Not Frequently Asked Question page as an example of my wit and on-going dedication to have as many tabs as possible on my blog. OR (and this is most likely- and when I say that this is ‘most likely’, I mean this is the truth and the other option is a decoy), we could take the fact that I now have a NFAQ’s page as a tribute to the people who asked me questions when I asked them to, but never ended up responding to. Because my damn life gets in the way sometimes of me being able to reply as quickly as I want to.

Feel free to ask more random questions in comments here- if there is one thing I love, it’s answering questions about myself. Well, that’s not entirely true. I do love George Clooney and those fruit jelly candies that make me feel healthy when I eat gobs of them, but not nearly as much as I love answering questions.

Renee asked me:
1. What song would be playing on repeat in your hell?
2. What would you smell for all eternity?
3. What mundane task would you be doing?
4.And who would annoy most as you do time for your sins?

1. There’s this song called “You jerk” by Kim Stockwood, which is probably the worst song of all time. I think it might be the only song that if I hear it on the radio, I will actually shriek with rage. It’s one of those intense dislikes that I can’t explain logically (but what intense dislike regarding music can one explain logically?).

2. Okay, I think I’m still in hell so I’m listing off my least favourite smells- Chanel 5 (I know. I KNOW. I’m supposed to love it, since every person with a uterus is supposed to adore it, but I don’t.), wet dog, dirty laundry and the smell of garbage. I know, no one loves the smell of garbage but I DETEST the smell.

3. My personal hell involves me doing a lot of ironing. This might explain why I don’t anything made out of linen. That, and the fact that I’m not 68 years old.

4. My hell companion would be Joan Rivers. Or Anne Coulter. Tucker Carlson. Pretty much anyone who is really loud and obnoxious and makes me cringe when they speak.

eyeingtenure asked:
1. Describe an embarrassing moment over which you still kick yourself.
2. More importantly, what color are your favorite socks?

1. Most embarrassing moment. Hmm. Take a walk with me to grade 10. First day of school. I’m wearing my new, so-white-they-hurt, Calvin Klein jeans. I sit down in Bio 10, and feel… strange. I shift in my seat and something doesn’t feel right. I panic. I start to sweat, I look nervously around and realize I have not a single friend in this class. I go to stand and feel something stuck. I grab my books, run to the front of the room and tell the teacher I have to go. She begins to ask why and then sees the trail of grape bubblegum that is stuck to me like a tail from my desk and has stretched to the front of the room where it sits firmly on my ass. She tells me I can go. I spend the next 38 minutes in the girls bathroom thinking my highschool career is going to be over before it even started all because someone left gum on my seat. In hindsight this really isn’t that awful but I remember at the time thinking I WAS GOING TO DIE OF EMBARRASSMENT. Thankfully, I survived. The jeans, however, did not. Let us take pause and remember them in all their glory.

2. I’m actually a fan of striped socks. I didn’t even realize this until a friend pointed out that I have the largest collection of striped socks she has ever seen. I know hold them in high regard and caress each pair 9 times before going to sleep whispering ‘my precious’.

Vanessa asked:
What city do you love the most to live in, not visit?

This question intrigued me. I have not lived in very many cities, but have visited quite a few. Based on everywhere I’ve been, I do think I would adjust quite well to living anywhere in Europe. I like forward men, festivals that involve beer and accents. I also love art, cobblestone and baguettes. So, Europe is a good fit.