“I still resent my mom for dressing up me and my twin sister in IDENTICAL clothes until we were in junior high. It was like a target on our backs saying ‘yes, please mock us’.” September 7, 2010
Posted by brandy in the secret project.trackback
It’s The Secret Project time! I apologize for not posting sooner, I feel like August went by in a blink and September is just starting to give me time to breathe. (Related fact: One of my biggest pet peeves is when people talk about how busy they are. Like.. isn’t everyone busy? Anyway. I’m sure there’s a word for when you commit your own pet peeve. If not, there should be.)
Before I get on with today’s secrets, I have been so full of new favourite things that I felt like I should share some of them. Here they are!
1. Favourite book for people over 5 feet tall: ”The Element” by Ken Robinson. SO. GOOOD. (My two word review really makes me think that I should have a part time job in book reviews).
2. Favourite Drink: Kool-Aid. Sure, I loved this when I was a kid but I just recently re-discovered it and have re-fallen in love. I’m sticking with classic orange for now, but blue raspberry sounds equal parts delicious and sugary awful.
3. Favourite book for people who believe in Santa Claus: “Thank you Mr. Falker”. Seriously. If you have not read it, just read it. Today. I read it to my grade 3 class and I may have got all wobbly voice on the last page. It makes you melty and thankful and grateful.
4. Favourite beauty product: Dry shampoo. No kidding. It saves me massive amount of time in the morning and my hair is healthier, not washing it as often. ( I have Oscar Blandi and I adore it. And yes, I just used the word “adore” to describe ‘dry shampoo’). Also? Voluminous mascara by loreal. The mascara one isn’t a new favourite but as someone who has tried EVERY SINGLE MASCARA KNOWN TO MAN, I weep when I hear that people are still spending $34 on Dior when Voluminous is $8 and is roughly 3,434 times better.
5. Favourite comment made by a student in my class: “Teacher, I’m having a big drink emergency and need a drink before my throat gets so dry I can’t talk”. With that kind of plea, how could I say no?
Secrets Time!
1. My brother in law is dying of cancer. I still blog about shallow things because it’s my way of coping but I feel so guilty every time I’m doing something superficial and fun. I hate how drawn out and painful this situation is for everyone and I don’t want anyone to suffer anymore. But then I realise that for everyone to stop suffering (including my brother in law) then the worst has to happen. I am so confused and just wish everything would get better somehow. Sometimes I’m scared I can’t be strong enough to support everyone through this
2. I only realized I wasn’t a lesbian when I drunkly kissed the man of my dreams.
3. My husband and I are at a stalemate that could ruin our marriage. We both want out of the townhouse I bought in 2004 and am underwater on. I want to get out legitimately, by paying off our debt to reduce our debt-to-income ratio (even if it takes another four years, he has more and makes less), then selling this house as a short sale & buying something new. He wants to me (as the homeowner) to forge a lease, saying someone else is living here, lie on our applications that we’re living with my parents for free, so that we can remove my current mortgage from our debt-to-income ratio. That is fraud, investigated by the FBI and punishable by 30 years in prison and a $350k fine. He says that my “high morals” about this situation are going to cost us tens of thousands of dollars, and is giving me the ultimate cold shoulder. I would rather divorce him, as much as I love him, than commit fraud like this, and if he does it on his own I will turn him in. He sees my integrity as a character flaw, which makes me question why I married him in the first place. We just passed our 9 month marriage anniversary and have been together for 5 years.
4. My co-worker walks around barefoot and it makes me cringe so much I don’t know what to do. I’ve complained more than once already and dropped the words ‘fungal infection’ to her, but she doesn’t get the hint.
5. I tell people I am reading for school (I’m getting my masters) and that’s why I can’t come out. In truth? I’m watching Jersey Shore.
6. When my wife and I got married, we both really wanted kids. Three years and 3 miscarriages later- I’m ready and fully willing to accept a life without kids. The stress is just, overwhelming. She, however, is not ready to quit and it’s starting to become an obsession that’s ruining our marriage.
7. I want to be a better person, I’m just looking for a way.
8. I live with two men (I’m a girl) and I routinely drink the last of the milk and put it back in the fridge. I also eat all the Oreos and put the empty bag back and will leave a chip bag in the pantry with exactly 3 chips in it. I always blame one of the roommates and the one I’m talking to always believes me. Since well, they are both slobs.
9. Singing out loud is my biggest fear. Not in that it makes me nervous, but on road trips when someone puts a cd in and everyone starts singing? I just mouth the words. I’m terrified that people will comment on how bad my voice is. And even though I know, logically that my friends wouldn’t say anything even if it was, I just can’t bring myself to it.
10. The best part of my day is laying on my couch, biting the bottom out of a drumstick ice cream cone and sucking all the vanilla ice cream out through the whole at the bottom of the cone. And yes, I’m happily married, have a great job- but this ice cream routine, makes me so giddy.
So many good ones.
The last one makes me so happy. I wanna try that.
I agree about the last one… Sounds blissful
#3 DO NOT DO WHAT YOUR HUSBAND is suggesting. I once, after being convinced by a BF, came way to close to something similarly fradulent. i was so overcome with anxiety i didn’t eat/drink anything and smoked a pack a day. thank god i backed out, one of the best decisions of my life. our relationship ended, which of course was for the best. good luck to you!!
“I would rather divorce him, as much as I love him, than commit fraud like this”
Please, stick to that thought!
I love the last one too.. and wow, the husband wanting to fraud the system – that is TOUGH. Stick to your guns, there’s no good that will come out of that, there really isn’t.
I’m with you on the cheaper mascara. I’m in love with a Maybelline one.
#9? I totally have the same fear. Most of the time I don’t even mouth the words, I just smile and bob my head like an idiot. No idea why, either.
#3. Get out now. If your husband is pressuring you to do something illegal, he doesn’t deserve you or your love.
I looove the last one, don’t ever give that up!
And #3 these are hard times, but fraud isn’t an answer, and your husband should know the effect that putting you in this position will have on your marriage. I’m so sorry, but I vote don’t back down. If he can’t see the sense here I would worry about what other things will come up down the line, even if his intentions are good.
#3, get thee both to a counselor if that’s what it takes, or DTMFA. He’s asking to you to do something that will send YOU to JAIL. YOU, not him! He’s being an a$$hole, period.
Wow, crazy secrets today!
I love the last one as well. 
#6 as someone who struggles with infertility, I can say it’s more than an obsession, it’s an imperative. I would suffer a thousand times before I would give up. And my husband is strong enough to suffer with me. Don’t ask your wife to give up. She will resent you, or leave you. I would.
The title secret? That, in a nutshell, is why my girls aren’t going to wear matching outfits.
(Well, except I did buy them matching outfits for coming home from the hospital, but only because the tiny hoodies are SO CUTE.)
I can totally relate to #4 because I’ve been that co-worker — except I walk around in socks. That is, until my boss told me I was dressing unprofessionally for the workplace. Now, I’m all buttoned up and shoe-shined.
I want to try the last one.
I’m currently stocking-footed in the office. I regularly walk around barefoot. Shoes are overrated. Sorry it offends you but my tootsies feel LIBERATED!
hahaha i do the last one too – it’s bliss!
#3 – stick to your guns. You’re definitely right on this one!
#6 – dont’ give up on your marriage just yet, but I do hope you and your wife come to a mutual agreement, whether it’s to keep trying, adopt or settle down to a life without kids. Hang in there – love and support each other as much as you can, and hopefully, you’ll both pull through this time
My heart hurts for the woman in #3. What a tough place but I think she’s already basically made her decision.
#4: I’m the barefoot one. And it doesn’t bother me one bit.
#5: stratejoy.com – The best website for making yourself better.
As a fellow teacher, I concur with your “Thank You Mr. Falker” review. Love, love, love! (That’s my 3 word review.)
I just ordered Thank You Mr. Falker from Amazon so I can read it to my students. Thanks for the recommendation. I am with you on the mascara – that stuff rocks. Going to look for your dry shampoo recommendation too.
That last one is the greatest thing I’ve read all day. How is that for pure, unadulterated joy? Those are the moments life should be about. The simple things. I love it.
#6 made me achy. I know how something like that can either tear people apart or bring them together. Many people I know have struggled with infertility and my heart breaks for them all the time. To be honest, I’m scared to death to start trying for kids because I don’t know if I could handle multiple miscarriages or infertility. It would break my heart.
Also, on a lighter note: Thank you for the mascara recommendation! Ahhhh! I’ve tried so many different kinds, but have yet to find one that I truly adore.
#6 I totally understand how you are feeling. Infertility can be so hard on men, you guys see how the women you love is suffering and you can’t do anything about it. You are allowed to have an opinion on this but you have to be very patient and understanding. I think you should draw the line when it comes to her health. If her need to have a baby risks her life….well the outcome would impact you too.
For now, be patient. Hopefully things work out for the best or she comes around and starts looking at other options.
Either way I wish you both luck.
Ok but how are you going to get a fungal infection if YOU are wearing shoes? Stop the judgment and let Hippie Girl fly her freak flag high! Kudos to her, honestly.
sorry love, but I must disagree with your take on L’Oreal v. Dior – I fell for the marketing and assurances of the kind woman at the counter when she told me L’Oreal was just as good for a mere fraction of the Dior price. Sadly, all of it untrue. The L’Oreal started out promising but within a mere few hours was flaking all over the place.
So, back to paying the $35 for Dior and LOVING it
#3.
All I can say is DAVE RAMSEY DAVE RAMSEY DAVE RAMSEY! I am almost sure that he actually tackled a question that was similar to yours. He has helped our marriage so much! We are 70k in debt and doing his program has provided me with security knowing that it is possible to be debt free! And also great marriage advice: Mark Gungor. He has a podcast and you can write in and have your questions anwsered!