A young girl was breaking up with the “looks good on paper” fiancé. They were standing on a dock facing the ocean, watching the waves coming in when she handed him back the ring that had been the promise of their future. She wished that he would do something impulsive, something reckless. She silently prayed he would throw the ring into the ocean,  if he could do something like that- an irresponsible and unexpected grand gesture, he would be the one for her. She realized that’s what she needed- proof he was willing to do more than any other man. Instead, he put it the ring in his pocket.

I remember reading that moment from a book in my early twenties and relating to the want of the big gesture. Despite what my gender might say, how they might refuse the idea of something so… wild, every girl does want to be the recipient of a grand signal of love. At least once. I know that sounds like a high maintenance request, but I think if you are with the right person- you will want to do it. Isn’t that what love is? A willingness to put yourself on a limb and hope that someone follows? To cast out the words you want to say and hope that someone is there to catch them? To do more than what’s required, what’s expected, what’s assumed to be the best choice and to just throw the damn diamond in the ocean?

Plane trips. Dumping out the contents of your heart and not needing a response because it’s not about someone else saying something to make you feel good, it’s about you trying to make someone else feel good. Handwritten haikus. Jumping on a Ferris wheel and refusing to let go until you get the date. (Okay, the last one was more Nicholas Sparks idea than mine…) Regardless if it’s right, or if it makes sense… sometimes things need to get messy. Sometimes the only way to get the girl is through the impractical act. Sometimes only doing what doesn’t make sense is the way to make sense of everything. A big, chaotic declaration that can’t go unnoticed or be misunderstood.

Of course there is no guarantee such an act will result in the happy ending Hollywood has us believing is the outcome of all romantic gestures. It doesn’t always work. But wouldn’t the world be a more interesting place if more people attempted the grand gesture? Isn’t it worth the risk sometime? What’s the point of yearning for an impossibly fantastic life if you won’t take a heart pounding chance? How can you expect one with out the other?

I don’t remember what happened to the girl except that she didn’t end up with the fiancé. Maybe that’s the only thing worth remembering.