Don’t date boys named Teddy. Always buy the shoes. Be the first person to say sorry. Righty tighty, lefty loosey. Whitehorse is the capital of Yukon (a white horse= unicorn, sounds like Yukon). Frying an onion is the quickest way to make your kitchen smell like dinner.Keep your hand flat when you feed a horse. Bigger sunglasses are always better. Teddy Cannon will always be trouble. Moisturize. Count to ten before you say something you regret- and if you are still mad, count higher. Wear red. Give more than you want and you will get more than you need. When you are young and in a group of three girls, one girl will almost always feel left out- include everyone. You can always have more garlic. Hot curlers fix a bad hair day. No really, Teddy will break your heart. It’s color- not dye. A rake makes cleaning a horse stall a lot easier. Be brave. Everybody has problems. Own something leopard print. Invest in a good can opener- and stocks. Find something to like in everybody. You can tell how old a horse is by their teeth. It’s hussy, not whore. You really do need to sort your laundry. You are too young to use the word “old”. Don’t say something about someone that you couldn’t say to their face. Fresh flowers are not an extravagance but an necessity. If you want something- ask for it. Adding vanilla pudding to chocolate chip cookie mix makes them taste so much better. Look people in the eye. TEDDY IS TROUBLE. Take a photo of what you want your hair to look like when you get it cut. The difference between “your” and “you’re”. Buy lemons. It’s not really giving if you expect something in return. Your shortest skirt should not be wore with your tallest shoes. And lastly, never say ” I told you so”- it’s annoying and can usually be said only when someone has made a poor choice and needs your support. Especially when the choice involves boys named Teddy.

Happy Mother’s Day!